System Board
What is a good reward/rule board system for 5 &8 yr old?
My friend is having trouble with her 5yr old son and her 8yr old step son. Shes a push over and tired of having her kids walk all over her until the point that she loses it. I told her I would come over tonight and help set up some rules.
I want to write the rules on a poster board so everyone can see them and have the consequences on another poster board so everyone know what happens when you dont listen.
I would also like to set up a reward system for when they are good, but need some ideas.
I was thinking maybe every week get a $5 gift card to target to pick out a toy or something like that.
What are good,simple rules to write up? I know no back talking and no hitting but what else am I missing?
She pretty new at this having them follow the rules thing and want to help her make it sucessful for everyone sake.
Please help.
What a great friend you are!
You need to talk to your friend about what the kids do that is not aloud. Different parents have different rules for children. For instance, a rule in this house is to not go in the kitchen, unless invited. Most homes don’t have that rule, so make sure you know of rules that apply to particularly her home as well. Another rule of ours is “you can only pout or whine in your bedroom” most homes don’t have that rule either. If I were you, I would make the poster board at your friend’s house so you can get her input. I could sit here and name off all of the rules we have, but they might not apply to her home (you have the basic rules: no hitting, no fighting, no backtalking). Leave plenty of space at the bottom so you can add rules if you or your friend forget! It’s important to let her participate in the ‘rule’ making. After all, she’s the one who has to enforce the rules.
After you discuss with her the rules of her home, you may find that you need 2 separate rule boards. Since the kids are different ages, they may have different rules and expectations.
DON’T FORGET REWARDS. Why would the kids want to participate in this new system if they don’t get something out of it?? You should make 2 other charts (one for each kid), along with the ‘rule poster/s’. In this house, we have the ’smiley face system’. Each hour my 6 y/o gets either a sad face, happy face, or straight face (in the instance that he’s equally good/bad). I’ll often say “if you can get 3-4 smiley faces in a row, you’ll get a reward (something simple, like playing outside or watching a movie). This is sometimes hard to do (since it’s every hour), but can definately be applied daily. You can make a chart and if the kid was good that day, a sticker will be placed on the chart. For instance, if the kid gets at least 5 stickers in a 7 day week, they’ll get a reward (renting a movie on the weekend, staying up late on friday night, etc.).
This most work will have to be done for her. Make sure the consequences of breaking a rule is next to the rule on the poster board. SHE HAS TO FOLLOW THROUGH WITH PUNISHMENTS AND REWARDS OR THIS SYSTEM WILL NOT WORK!!!!
Good luck to you, and like I said, you’re a great friend!
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